Archive for: Something to Ponder

1. Even if you don’t love yourself right now, remind yourself of better times.
2. What do you, or others, admire about you?
3. Think of a time when you were exceptionally kind to someone.
4. Who are you willing to make sacrifices for and what does that mean about you?

Pain does not have to mean suffering. It’s our interpretation of the situation, and our tendency to dwell and get caught in a negative feedback loop, that creates suffering out of pain. We can’t avoid pain, much as we would like to, but we can minimize our suffering by looking at the situation, accepting it, and letting it go. Easier said than done, of course, but isn’t it a better use of your time to repeat ‘happy thoughts’ then negative ones?

Our brains register our facial expression and interpret our feelings for us. Even if you have to practice a smile when you don’t feel happy, the more you practice it, the more your brain will believe it! It may feel a little silly at first, but the more you smile with your face, the more you will smile with your heart and soul.

I recently watched ‘Eat, Pray, Love;’ in it, there is a scene where they come up with the word for London (stuffy), Rome (sex), etc. Melissa Gilbert (the author) realizes she has identified herself by who she is compared to others: daughter, wife, girlfriend, etc. She also identifies as her job (writer). But, she does not know who she really is, as she stands alone. Even if you’re not there yet, what word do you want to describe you? Calm, peaceful, fun, content? Why not find a word that encompasses how you want to live your life and strive towards that end? Even if it’s not fully realized, trying to search for your bliss sure is worth the effort!

Do you think anyone ever said on their deathbed, I wish I had worked more? Most people want to make amends, tell their loved ones how much they really care, and do fun, exciting things they had never gotten around to doing. Why not infuse that into your living now? “Love deeper” and speak “sweeter” to the people who are already in your life. Participate in the activities that make you feel connected to others, alive, and energetic. If that’s your job, bravo! However, for most of us, we need that experience in multiple areas of our lives.

Why do we take life so seriously? Maybe we need to take some lessons from our children. We should strive to learn new tasks, to progress, grow, and accomplish in life. But, why can’t we do that through play, exploration, and fun. Maybe the key isn’t that we need to take life less seriously but that’s it’s not really that serious after all. “It’s only life after all.”

“The less I seek my source of the definitive, closer I am to fine.” A key to inner peace is being able to accept what life throws your way. This is a cornerstone to mindfulness based practices. If I can accept that I don’t know the answer, I can deal with the ambiguity in life, of which there is much, maybe I can live a happier life not focusing on the ‘what ifs.’

“Darkness has a hunger that’s insatiable, and lightness has a call that’s hard to hear.” It’s true that our brains are more prone to focus on the negative than the positive. It makes sense. We don’t need happiness in order to ‘survive’ biologically. However, happiness and reduced stress does permit us to live longer. So, if working on happiness is seven times harder than giving into the darkness, is it worth it? Anyone who smiles more than they frown would say, absolutely. And why not have fun trying!?

Ask yourself the following questions:

 What barriers did I face?

 What was my contribution?

 Whatever happened, happened, now what?

 How can I take responsibility for my life and turn the lessons from failure into positive change?

 Thomas Edison quote: “I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward.”