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Darkness has a hunger that’s insatiable, and lightness has a call that’s hard to hear.

“Darkness has a hunger that’s insatiable, and lightness has a call that’s hard to hear.” It’s true that our brains are more prone to focus on the negative than the positive. It makes sense. We don’t need happiness in order to ‘survive’ biologically. However, happiness and reduced stress does permit us to live longer. So, if working on happiness is seven times harder than giving into the darkness, is it worth it? Anyone who smiles more than they frown would say, absolutely. And why not have fun trying!?

 

Acknowledgment and Acceptance are the key to changing ‘failure’ into a growth experience.

Ask yourself the following questions:

 What barriers did I face?

 What was my contribution?

 Whatever happened, happened, now what?

 How can I take responsibility for my life and turn the lessons from failure into positive change?

 Thomas Edison quote: “I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward.”

Choosing Happiness

March 25, 2013

Choosing Happiness – GUEST POST FROM HEATHER MCKENZIE

I’ve come to believe that feeling happy is not something that happens to us or doesn’t happen to us. There are not happy people and unhappy people. Sure, some people seem to have an easier time than others choosing happiness, but I believe that when it comes down to it, it’s a choice for everyone. And for me some days, being happy feels like a very difficult choice. So if I’m feeling low or struggling to get the happy feeling I know I want, I do the following: grab some paper, a pen, and start writing a list. A list of everything I can think of in just a few moments that I’m grateful for: my working car, my best friend’s homemade meatballs, my paying job, my eyes and vision, running water every time I turn on the faucet, putting on warm clothes straight from the dryer, North Carolina sun, fresh cookies, listening to live music outside, my new pair of shoes, being without physical pain, my nephew’s giggle, a silly YouTube video, family coming to visit, remembering to bring my umbrella….nothing is too little or too big to add.  I make the list as long as needed until I can feel my mood shift.

Give it a try – see how capable you are of choosing happiness for yourself!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Heather McKenzie, M.S., NCC, LPC
Turning Point Family Care, PLLC
1708 Trawick Rd. Suite 101
Raleigh, NC 27604
(919) 896-7536
[email protected]

 

Cyberbullying

Cyberbullying has been gaining more and more media attention with several recent teen suicides linked to this relatively new form of harassment. Experts agree that cyberbullying is not the sole cause of suicide but can certainly be a strong contributor. The Cyberbully Research Center defines cyberbullying as “willful and repeated harm inflicted through the use of computers, cell phones, and other electronic devices.” It occurs with communication tools such as social media sites, chat, email, phone calls, and texting. It can come in the form of threats, cruel rumors, embarrassing pictures and videos, fake profiles, sharing someone else’s personal information, or excluding them from online social groups. Deception is often used, as in pretending to be a friend to solicit personal information from a person, or pretending to be someone else for the same purpose. The goal of cyberbullying is to intentionally humiliate, harass, intimidate, or exclude the victim. Read More→

Our Interns Share Where They Find Happiness

March 18, 2013

We asked our Interns this question…”Where do you find happiness?”  Their answers are below.

• Happiness is everywhere! It’s spending time with my boyfriend/friends/family, exploring a new city, or just snuggling on the couch with my dogs. I don’t have to search for happiness- it’s all around me.
• It is found by searching for a positive aspect of any scenario.
• I find happiness in my relationships with friends and family, as well as shared experiences, especially spontaneous activities.
• Happiness can be found anywhere, but I find it through God, friends, family, and chocolate. 😉
• Mostly within myself; as a result of my actions.

Happiness And Smiling

March 11, 2013

The James-Lange theory says emotions are a response to physiological changes – you feel your heart racing and you feel anxious, you smile and you feel happy. There are many (very good) arguments against this theory. You may have already thought of a few of them! But… try it anyway, right now. Smile a real smile with your whole face, your cheeks and eyes. Do you feel a teensy, tiny bit happier? Even if you don’t, imagine if you smiled real smiles more often during the day even when you didn’t feel happy – what would happen? People would see you smiling and react to that. It could be a feedback loop of happiness! In any event, it couldn’t hurt, right? =)

Our Interns – Their Views On Happiness

March 4, 2013

Here at Lepage Associates, we currently have five interns who are with us from local universities.   They are here to learn about the practice & get experience in the field of psychology.  During the spring we’ll be asking them for their thoughts on “happiness” as a young adult on the edge of their next chapter – here is the first question we asked them and their answers:

What is happiness to you?

  • I define my happiness as the sense of accomplishment I get as a result of my hard work, dedication, and determination that I’ve put-forth on a task or goal. The goals could be anything – getting a good test grade, scoring a date, getting physically fit, etc.
  • Happiness is doing the things I love, with the people I love.
  • Happiness is smiling, laughing, and genuinely feeling good wherever you are. It’s free.
  • Happiness is being content with things going on in your life, regardless of the ups and downs. Happiness is accepting things as they are and looking for the positive in every situation.
  • Happiness to me is feeling fulfilled in all aspects of my heath: mentally, emotionally, as well as physically. I feel happiest when I feel satisfied with all three parts of my health.

Good Posture Makes You Happy

February 18, 2013

Good posture allows your spine and not a whole bunch of struggling back muscles to support the weight of your upper body.

You breathe more easily with good posture, because you can use your diaphragm more effectively and allow your belly to expand. This actually allows you to use the entire length of your lungs and muscles, unlike chest breathing. You get more oxygen circulating to your muscles and your brain, allowing you to feel and think better!

Good posture allows your shoulders hang more naturally, preventing tension in your neck and shoulders and head.

You are perceived as more confident by others when you have good posture, and this affects how they treat you.

You actually feel more confident when you have good posture. Studies have shown that good posture increases the amount of testosterone released in the body (associated with level of confidence) and decreases levels of cortisol (associated with level of stress).

Not overtaxing my back muscles? Using deep, relaxing breathing? Thinking clearly? No neck and shoulder tension, or tension headaches? Having people respond to my confidence? Changing my body chemistry so I feel more confident and less stressed? I feel happy already!

You Are More Than Your Illness

February 11, 2013

This post is about embracing possibilities, which is always a positive and happy thought. We are all more than our “shell” and have so much to contribute. Don’t let your illness define you.

Illness may be seen or unseen…obvious or hidden.

Illness may bring physical, emotional, or spiritual pain.

Illness may bring acceptance or bitterness.

Illness may limit you or propel you into new and different places.

Illness changes you, but it does not define you.

You are more than your illness…so much more.

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