Archive for: Something to Ponder

The book Happiness Rules by Manuel Astruc, a board-certified psychiatrist from New York, discusses the relationship between success, burnout, and happiness. As an entrepreneur, Astruc knew about the devastating effects of burnout all too well. He uses stories about his life and struggles with burnout, addiction, and mental health to curate real but inspirational advice to the readers. 

As people, we often measure our worth based on our professional success. This constant pressure to be “better” can cause people to fall into burnout, defined by the World Health Organization as “a syndrome conceptualized as resulting from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed.” Some symptoms of burnout are exhaustion (physical and mental), being detached from work, growing cynical, and losing effectiveness. While burnout from work can seem only directly to affect your professional life, the catastrophic effects from continuous burnout seep their way into every aspect of your life. It affects your friends, family, mood, and outlook. The widespread effects of burnout can cause many people’s worlds to flip upside down. Does not work lead to success, which leads to happiness? Well, according to Astruc, no. He believes we must reverse this mindset, thinking that happiness leads to success. Astruc defines happiness as “the feeling of joy as you strive to achieve your potential.” If we change our goal to happiness rather than success, we will focus on things that truly matter to us. We will essentially be using happiness to fuel us and, therefore, our success. 

But how do we truly embrace happiness? Thankfully, Astruc gives us some guidelines: 

• Embrace the suck: Happiness is not always happy. You are not going to be perfectly content all the time. Along with life being generally difficult, changing how you function in the world is hard, even if it is for your benefit. Shifting your mindset is hard. It might be challenging to focus more on yourself and your needs. Breaking bad practices and maintaining a work-life balance is hard work. You must consciously tell yourself to focus on your well-being and break the cycle. But while this might be stressful, focusing on yourself and your happiness will ultimately improve your life. 
• Make your future bigger than the past: Complacency and stagnancy mixed is not a beneficial recipe. While you may feel comfortable in your ways, that does not make them good for you. Change is tough, especially when you feel like there is so much to do and you do not even know where to start. The best thing you can do is stop looking at the past. Do not wonder what you could have or should have done earlier. That will not do any good. Embrace where you are now. And think about what you have control of right now. Make your future bigger than the past. Make goals for yourself (see January 2023’s Something to Ponder for tips on SMART goals!). Goals create hope for the future and let you know that you are in control in the now. You have the power to make changes for the better. 
• Connection with others: Maintaining and improving your relationships with those around you is essential. Being so focused on work can often make us lose sight of those around us. Evaluate your relationships: Are they healthy or unhealthy? Why? What can I do to maintain my connection with this person? As humans, we need connections with others to thrive. 
• Blaze your own trail: Evaluate what makes you you. What makes you unique? What are your strongest abilities? What is your purpose? What are you curious about? What do you want to pursue? We can often get caught up in what people say is valuable without actually evaluating it for ourselves. That is why it is so important to explore different things. And with the rise of the internet, online courses and resources are more available now than ever! Truly explore what makes you happy and fulfilled. If you focus on that, success will come. 
• Commit to enjoying the ride no matter what: Improving yourself is not linear. It is hard work to change anything in your routine, let alone how you view success and, more broadly, life. Do not expect to stay on course the whole time. Being off course is part of the ride of improvement. Do not get discouraged if you mess up. If anything, be excited! You are doing the work! As long as you understand what went wrong and how to fix it moving forward, that is great! Be proud of yourself for trying, failing, and then getting back up. That is the hardest part. 

I know that is a lot of information to think about, but if you want to hear more directly from Manuel Astruc, I strongly encourage you to read his book Happiness Rules. There are even a few videos of him on Youtube if you are a more visual person!

Phones have become an intricate part of our lives. Now that we can access seemingly everything we want to with just a couple taps and swipes, it can almost feel impossible to not want to scroll on social media apps, text, call, take photos, browse google or do anything else virtually we want when we want to. This, however, can be emotionally draining and exhausting, as well as impact our mental health in a variety of ways. For one, constant messaging and emailing through our phones throughout the day can cause more stress in our lives, making it seem that we are not the ones in control. In other words, with notifications popping up, it can feel like we are living in a continuous to-do list that keeps adding things to our agenda. Furthermore, it can taint our sense of gratification. Our phones are an electronic dopamine loop, meaning we can scroll online to gain instant gratification and fulfillment. With this constantly occurring, we can become too engulfed in our phones to realize the happiness that surrounds all of us in our lives. Now, I am not saying phones are always bad. Sometimes we do receive important text messages or phone calls that we need to respond to immediately, however, because constant usage of our phones does have implications on lowering our mental wellness, try this little mindfulness experiment to see how much your phone may be impacting your mood:

First, pick a day to monitor your phone usage. Carry on throughout the day like any normal day, and use your phone the same amount. What I will ask you to do though is to be mindful about how scrolling, answering texts, answering phone calls, going online, etc. makes you feel before and after you do so. Jot down some notes about what emotions you have and have what you are engaging with on your phone, as well as how your overall mood is throughout the day. Now, pick a day to set your phone down. Try going throughout your day without checking your phone. If you feel you need to, ask yourself why you need to, what will that benefit, and what would happen if you did not. Jot down notes on how you feel without your phone. Do you feel like you are missing something or uncomfortable? Do you feel more in the moment and present? How have you been feeling throughout the day? Next, compare the notes over the course of the two days and reflect on the way your phone usage is interacting with your mental wellness and behaviors. You may just find something out about yourself and your phone usage that you may want to change!

Just like any type of skill, people vary in their level of expertise in creativity, however, regardless of how well you think you are, creativity is a great source for practicing mindfulness. Well first, what is creativity? Creativity can come in various forms from working on a garden, to painting, to even planning a party for a friend. Creativity is just using your imagination and engaging your time, effort, and feelings into a goal. Findings suggest having these creative goals can increase one’s happiness, optimism, and excitement. With this being said, finding what allows you to be creative can serve as a great tool to release any negative thoughts and feelings onto a canvas, paper, or whatever outlet of creativity you decide to indulge in.  One of the main reasons why we find ourselves relieving our stress, anxieties, anger, and other negative emotions through creative goals is the ability for creativity to engage one into a “flow.” This flow is what can create a euphoric feeling that allows us to stay focused, engaged, mindful, present, and when it is all done, accomplished. Because of this, it is important to find your creative goal that you will be able to be excited about and enjoy doing. It is also important to note to not get frustrated at first. Creativity is a skill that needs to be developed, so by continuing to use your imagination and engage your senses into what you decide your creative goal is, you are already getting better! Try drawing, painting, dancing, or even going outside and cloud watching to start on your creative goal, and become more creatively mindful!

With platforms like Netflix and Hulu, it can be difficult to refrain from sitting on the couch, putting on our favorite show, and watching it for a while as a form of relaxation. Research, however, shows that binge watching as a form of relaxation and a break from our busy lives, may not be the best option. Binge-watching has even been linked to sleep problems, social deterioration, and sedentary behaviors due to being isolated and gaining stimuli straight from the comfort of your own couch. Now, I am not saying that occasional watching is bad, however, instead of using precious free-time to watch a series or surf the wonders of Netflix, it may be more beneficial to find a hobby that you find interesting and exciting! Diverting attention to something that you want to get better at or experience more in the form of a hobby has been linked to increases in general mood, increases in interest, increases in problem solving and other cognitive functions, as well as decreases in stress. In other words, hobbies promote happiness and a general sense of well-being! Hobbies also give you a chance to connect with others that have similar interests. It gives the opportunity to work on something with a group or talk about it in a way that is both social and exciting for all. Because all of us are unique and have various curiosities and ways of enjoying ourselves, hobbies can widely range from crafting to skiing to even juggling! It is important to find something that truly excites you so that you can invest your time into something that you will want to. So, write a list of some things you would be interested in and dive in to experience the happiness that surrounds hobbies!

Some stress can be good! That is something we don’t often hear, however, it is true. The trick is to find your stress’s sweet spot that allows you to function optimally and efficiently, without letting it get too out of control to a point where too much energy is spent worrying and feeling anxious. On one end of the spectrum, extremely low levels of stress can cause insufficient amounts of daily arousal to give you the necessary oomph to work efficiently. It may make you feel bored or lazy, and can even lead to some incidences of depression. At this end of the spectrum, too low levels of stress can decrease attention and interest which can be dangerous as we take on our busy and action-ready lives. If this is the case, it may be beneficial to take on some more responsibilities, projects, hobbies, or skills to build up the necessary stress required for you to feel productive.

On the other end of the spectrum, however, where extremely high levels of stress are present, too high of stress hormone levels can cause cognitive issues such as memory complications, altered concentration and constant worrying, emotional issues such as irritability, moodiness and loneliness, and can even cause physical complications as well such as headaches, digestive problems and heart diseases. At this end of the spectrum, too high of stress can create a lot more havoc in our already busy lives than we need! If this is the case, it is important to get a healthy nights rest, find time to do something you enjoy, talk with friends and family about what is causing you worry and anxiety, and to practice engaging your mind on the things you can control instead of all the things we wish we could.

Back to the main idea: some stress can be good! Research conducted at UC Berkeley shows that with just the right amount of healthy stress in our lives, this can give us the ability to work efficiently and optimally without being too worried and anxious. They found that with this healthy middle ground, cognitive functions such as attention and memory can increase, allowing us to perform the best. With this being said, this middle ground is different for everyone, and it is important to recognize your emotions and feelings when trying to figure out your stress’s sweet spot!

Do you struggle with sleep issues? If so, you’re not alone. 30% to 40% of U.S. adults suffer with insomnia symptoms at some point during the year. There are many behavioral practices that can help get you back on track, and one of our favorites is a very simple trick: stepping out into the sun first thing in the morning. Being in natural light helps our bodies produce serotonin, which is the precursor to melatonin, the hormone which helps regulate our sleep and wake cycles. Thus, getting some sunlight first thing helps our bodies get the raw materials that will help us produce melatonin as the day winds down. Nathaniel Watson, MD, a sleep specialist and professor of neurology at the University of Washington School of Medicine, says sunlight is the single most important element for setting our circadian rhythm, and morning light is key. And best of all, it’s easy! Just 15 minutes of morning sunlight exposure will do the trick, but any is better than none. So, go on a morning walk, eat your breakfast outside, or read a chapter of your book in your lawn chair–whatever works best for you!

When it comes to our change and growth, we cannot underestimate the power of consistency. It is better to do less if it means we can do it more often. For example, if you are starting out at the gym, perhaps it is better to leave the gym after twenty minutes rather than push yourself to do a whole hour. This way you will recover faster and be able to go back in a couple days. Also, if you push yourself to do something for too long, you may get burnt out or dread picking it up again. When we are trying to make change, we often get a lot of energy at the front-end and try to jump in too fully. But when it comes to success, nothing can replace that slow but consistent energy that doesn’t overcommit and allows you to accomplish small goals. So, if you are trying to pick up the guitar, instead of blocking out four hours on Sunday, try to dedicate 20 minutes three evenings a week. Overtime, you can increase your commitments, but always keep in mind that the more consistent you are, the more likely you are to actually incorporate a new habit and have it improve your life.

According to the New York Post, only 8% of Americans keep their New Year’s resolutions. Many times, people set unreasonable expectations for themselves. Of course, we would all like to exercise more, eat better, and become “healthier.” However, that wording does not create a realistic, achievable goal. That’s when SMART goals come in. 

SMART goals, according to the University of California, describe goals that are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-Bound.

• Specific: “What will be accomplished? What actions will you take?”
• Measurable: “What data will measure the goal? How much? How well?”
• Achievable: “Is the goal doable? Do you have the necessary skills and resources?”
• Relevant: “How does the goal align with broader goals? Why is the result important?”
• Time-Bound: “What is the time frame for accomplishing the goal?”

The questions above guide you to ensure your goal meets the criteria. Once you write this goal (It might take a few sentences!), you should have a well-thought-out resolution. You can use SMART goals for anything, but resolutions greatly attest to their usefulness!

And, of course, give yourself the grace to make mistakes. Most people won’t stick to a new diet or routine perfectly. Let yourself mess up, then correct it. You’ve got this!

Why do holidays exist? To give thanks to those around you! To give perspective to your life! It’s easy to focus on the negatives in life. However, when you step back and focus on those who love you, you’ll be able to appreciate what you have.