This isn’t just a matter of you feeling like you can trust the other person with your secrets, emotions, and mistakes; it’s also that you can handle their messiness. We are a culture that emphasizes independence and sometimes that means we blame others when things don’t go our way. It’s helpful to take a step back and see if your boundaries are about protecting yourself from revealing too much or from knowing too much. Do you feel safe? Can you let down your defenses a bit?