In relationships, it can be helpful to reflect upon whether or not there were ‘good times’ prior to the conflict or crisis. Are you able to remember better times? Were those better times ‘very good’ or has there always been an empty, tainted or painful quality to the relationship. Sometimes it feels too hard to judge this when we are only viewing the negative aspects of a relationship; however, the challenge is to really take a step back and view the relationship as realistically as possible. Very often we are able to recognize the ‘very good’ times and finds ways to bring those qualities back into our relationships.